Who's teaching communication?

You want to know what kind of communicator you are (or were) on any given day? Just look at your phone!

As an English teacher, if I had a dollar for every time someone asked about, or I talked about, how technology was ruining interpersonal communication in today's world, I'd have had to claim supplemental income on my taxes this year. I don't disagree...a lot of technology today does inhibit people's ability to communicate effectively in person and in writing.

So when I came across this article today about how "my phone teaches me to be a better conversationalist" I initially braced myself for a Millenial's defensive testimony as to why technology was not ruining the current generation. However, upon reading the story, I found something unexpectedly contemplative. The basic premise is that, because text messages allow you to visualize a conversation, you can actually see and analyze the dynamics of communication...(Who's talking more? Has the conversation bee monopolized by one person? Do the party's show equal interest in what's being discussed based on volume of conversational language?) These are kind of language nerdy questions to ask and linguistic statistics to ponder. And because the article came with infographics, I can show you my point.

These differences aren't necessarily a bad thing...they just signal different types of conversations. For example, if something terrible happens at work, I might send J Word a long string of texts because I'm upset. He might only respond with one...maybe a question about something I said...to which I respond with three more texts. Some might say I'm monopolizing the conversation because I'm doing all the talking, but contextually, it makes sense because I'm telling a story. We can see physically see that context play out in the volume of text sent in a way that conversing face to face doesn't show us.

If I ask J Word how his day is going, and he responds with a similar question, to which I respond and a conversation back and forth continues, that signifies a different kind of conversational context.

So what does this all have to do with interpersonal communication? Well...very little actually...unless you're willing to take the awareness of different conversational modes and apply it to face to face communication. As the author says:

"I’ve found that visualizing our conversations this way helps me to identify what mode we’re in at any given moment, and what role I could play to best serve our communication needs - listener, talker, one-who-leaves-her-alone."

It's interesting...at least if you're an English nerd! I won't apologize for being one. 

Happy Trails, 

 

The "Un-Oscars"

Good Monday to the internet, where bloggers everywhere have taken to critiquing every joke, fashion faux pax, winner and loser, of last night's Academy Awards. I, however, will not be one of them. I, as it happened, did not watch the Oscars last night for a number of, what I consider, very good reasons.

1. I have not seen most of the movies that were nominated, and therefore had no emotional attachment or personal preferences regarding any of them.

2. I was on a very long, extended Skype call with Oz in Kansas, which I consider much more important and entertaining.

3. J Word and I got rid of our regular TV after football season ended, and subsist entirely on Hulu and Netflix now...so I couldn't have watched them, even if I wanted to.

I do admit to clicking through one online photo gallery of best dressed today at lunch because I happen to like pretty ball gowns (sorry I'm not sorry!) But that will likely be all of my Academy Award related festivities so...yay Oscars!

While we were dating, J Word and I had numerous conversations about movies, particularly because he has a penchant for choosing very weird movies to watch! As such, he claims he will not watch most of the Oscar winners because they are too mainstream, and not weird enough. (I think some of them look plenty weird...but not in a way that is necessarily appealing!) That said, I've watched a fair number of movies this year that I found highly entertaining that weren't nominated for anything last night, but I would still recommend, and how are you supposed to know about those movies unless someone shouts them into the void of the internet for those looking for a little cinematic inspiration.

And so, I give you my 2014-2015 "Un-Oscars" - The movies that won nothing...but are still worth two hours of your life!

Oscar Nominated Movie that I'm Most likely to Watch: Grand Budapest Hotel - This looks just weird enough that I can probably almost convince J Word to watch it with me...plus, of all the Oscar noms, it's the only one that everyone I know who's seen it has said positive things about. Close 2nd would be Big Hero 6.

Oscar Nominated Movie that I already saw and Love: How to Train your Dragon 2 - Cute, entertaining, worth the hour and a half to watch. Can't compare it to BH6 because I haven't seen the latter...but worth a movie night despite it's lack of an Oscar.

"Un-Oscar" for best action: Edge of Tomorrow: Live, Die, Repeat - Shoot 'em up, action-adventure is definitely not my type, but I really enjoyed this movie. Tom Cruise, though I find him annoying as a person, was good as a leading actor. The story got science fiction-y, but not in a bad way. I've recommended this movie to a bunch of people...and J Word enjoyed it as well, so it made for a good date night.

"Un-Oscar" for best comedy: The Internship - This movie actually came out in 2013, but I didn't find it until it hit on demand. Classic comedy set-up...Vince Vaughn/Owen Wilson pairing. A bit predictable, but a funny look into the world of Google, which I have a feeling is probably a pretty accurate representation. I was entertained. Close runner-up, Chef which is funny in a different kind of way...in case you're not a Vaughn/Wilson kind of comedic fan.

"Un-Oscar for best drama/romance: The Last Five Years - This is probably the first one that J Word would definitely disagree with me on because while he tolerated watching it with me, I'm pretty sure he didn't love it. I'm not even sure I loved all of it...but as a movie adaptation of a broadway production it worked really really well! Jeremy Jordan and Anna Kendrick were awesome! The score is amazing. Great story telling. It only got a little bit of press...in which it was well hyped. The hype is well deserved! See it!

"Un-Oscar" for Oscar nominee from last year that I saw this year and scratched my head as to what the Academy thought was "award winning about it: Her - Have you seen this movie? Do you know what it's about? He has a relationship with his computer server...which is also having a relationship with 1000s of other people. So so so so weird.

"Un-Oscar" Actress of the Year: In lieu of a best actress or actor for a single movie, I think the Academy should look at an actress/actor's body of work for the year, and consider who's repeatedly good at what they do...not just who took a great roll and made it exceptional. They can keep best actress/actor too...and it could even go to the same person if they're doing multiple, great things at a time. This year I'd three way tie Anna Kendrick (who can currently do no wrong on film...Pitch Perfect 2 will be a hit, The Last Five Years, Into the Woods...), and Shailene Woodley, who somehow managed to become both the face of the Divergent franchise, and Hazel in The Fault in Our Stars, and Emily Blunt who starred in the aforementioned Edge of Tomorrow and alongside Anna Kendrick in Into the Woods. I'm not saying any performance was "OH MY GOD!!" amazing...but they were all big blockbuster successes...so kudos to you!

"Un-Oscar" Actor of the Year: I'm a little less certain in this category. Benedict Cumberbatch is a good choice because of his work in The Imitation Game while also being Sherlock...though that crosses TV and movies, and only the Emmy's like to do that! Ansel Elgort also managed to snag parts in both Divergent and The Fault in Our Stars...so again, kudos to that!  

So...in case you got lost somewhere in my stream of conscious ramblings...your list of should sees:

• Into the Woods
• Edge of Tomorrow
• Grand Budapest Hotel
• How to Train your Dragon 2
• Big Hero 6
• The Internship 
• Chef
• The Last Five Years
• The Fault in Our Stars
• Divergent
• The Imitation Game
• Sherlock (on TV) 
• Pitch Perfect 2 (when it comes out) 

And anything else that won an Oscar last night...because obviously someone thought it was good, I guess! 

Happy Trails, 

The Winter Blahs

After enduring the sniffles since, well about, September when I reentered the germy petri dish that is a high school, this last weekend my immune system finally said, "Enough!" and I got sick. I went from functioning relatively well on Sunday morning, to sinuses throbbing, nose dripping, ears plugged, by Sunday afternoon, and it's stuck around for the better part of this week. I might have thought that making it to the end of February meant I was in the clear for cold/flu season, but as February has brutally reminded us this week, it's still very much winter. And it might remain very much winter for a while yet.

On the one hand, I suppose it could be worse...I could live in New England and be buried under 8 feet of snow. At the same time, I look at Boston's forecast and see that it's going to be 30 there today, whereas when I drove to school this morning it was -15, so I think I might actually take 8 feet of snow to the sub-zero alternative.

I generally don't like this part of winter very much. I tolerate the first half of winter because Christmas is thrown into the mix, and it's charming to have a snowy, white Christmas. Then I deal with January because, well, it's January, and you expect January to be cold and miserable in the upper midwest, and I live here by choice...so I'll deal with it. But then February rolls around, and I start to think, "You know what, it's been since about the end of October since I've been able to comfortably run outside. And I can't get into my car in the morning without running it for five minutes first because it's torturous to drive to work otherwise. And it'd be nice not to put eight layers of clothes on before taking the dogs outside." And then I start to think about the fact that it can snow in February...and March...and that twice in the last two years it's snowed in May...and that all gets very depressing!

I've written about beating the winter blues before, especially in running and trying to maintain a training schedule. Then I was thinking back to last year, when it was exceptionally cold and miserable all the time, and we had 5 days off of school for very very cold weather, and every other week they were throwing around the words "Polar Vortex," and I wondered why it didn't seem to bother me as much as this stretch of winter sometimes does. Then I realized that just about every time I was told it was too cold to do anything, and I should just stay indoors under a blanket and wait for safer temperatures, J Word and I were zipping back and forth between Rochester and La Crosse. So, my new advice to beating the winter blues should probably be...fall in love. Fall in love between the start of February and the end of April, and completely distract yourself from the worst three months in the upper midwest!

Maybe this year my advice should be, plan a wedding? That's certainly taken enough of my time and energy, and assembling, addressing, sealing, stamping, etc. our invitations distracted me all of last weekend. So maybe I just need more artsy/crafty projects to keep me occupied until May.

A third suggestion might be to move somewhere warmer because as I look at my Facebook feed, I can count at least 8 people I know that have relocated to permanently warmer temps this year, and they've all been rubbing it in our midwestern faces since about December.

But assuming none of those things are actually guaranteed or sustainable. (I mean, being in love in winter is great too...and I'm still all for sharing a blanket and snuggling. But you probably shouldn't actually get engaged or plan your wedding just to avoid winter blues, and moving isn't realistic.) So here are my five "beat the winter blues right now" go to moments for this week. ...in case you ever need a pep talk to get yourself out of bed on a cold morning (like I do most days!)

1. Find a winter blues busting song. Mine is currently "Geronimo" by Sheppard, and I have unapologetically listened to it on repeat on a number of occasions when I needed a boost!

2. Use winter as an excuse to do the things that are even harder to excuse in summer. When it's nice outside, I have a really hard time justifying not going outside with the dogs, or not going for a run, or not spending indulging in a Netflix or movie marathon on the couch. So sometimes, in winter, the fact that the weather sucks is the perfect excuse to do the otherwise inexcusable!

3. Find a summer reminder. This doesn't have to be any big thing; this can be silly and stupid. I have a yellow band for my fitbit that I started wearing this winter instead of the slate blue one that it came with because slate blue is a winter color, and lemon yellow is a summer color, and so...well, like I said, it can be silly and stupid!

4. Find something to look forward to that can only happen in winter. Ice skating outdoors, snow days, cross country skiing, college basketball season, Valentine's Day, there are plenty of things that people get excited about that can only happen as a result of the winter season. So figure out a personal winter pastime or passion, and pursue it.

5. Eat warm delicious food. Use the oven! There will soon be days when it's 90 degrees, and cooking anything will sound torturous as you don't want to be anywhere near the stove, heat, or an oven. These are not those days. Use the stove. Make a pot of soup that warms the whole kitchen. Bake cookies and enjoy the warm, delicious smell that wafts through the house. Comfort food is dinner for the winter worn soul! Bon appetit!

Stay warm. Happy Trails,

 

Friday the 13th - Breaking the Blog Silence

Ahem...any one still out there? If not I don't blame you, it's been quite the blogging hiatus, almost a month to be exact. And while I don't really have a good excuse, that won't keep me from making excuses!

So what's occupied my time other than shouting into the void of the internet? Well, all of the things really. There's wedding planning, my venture into competitive high school theatre, trying to get back into a real training routine, J Word, work in general, studying for my Minnesota license exams...you get the idea. There's always something, but that something hasn't been a lot of writing time. 

Actually, I shouldn't say that either! I have been doing a lot of writing too...just not blogging. I'm actually about 82 pages into writing the second draft of the novel I started two years ago. So yeah, that's a long and tedious process, but it's been fun and worth it as the second effort is, so far, a much more engaging story than the first.

Like I said, I have all the excuses. It's not that I've just been slacking! Promise! 

So...for the Friday Five...a quick rundown of all the things...

1. High School One Act Competition - This is a thing that did not exist as part of my own high school experience, and maybe for good reason. The one act "season" came up almost immediately after finishing the high school musical, and to be entirely honest, I was burned out on theatre! Nevertheless, we launched a production just before Christmas break started and ended our competition season with a 4th place finish at sectionals just over a week ago. As could have been expected, for as burned out as I was when we started, the excitement and energy of the kids for the production and performances got me through the season. But now, having been involved with a production of some sort since September, I'm really really glad that I can take a breath for a moment, and won't have to worry about a spring show.

2. All things weddings - A fellow blogging friend recently suggested that the best way to plan a wedding and make time to blog at the same time is to start "Wedding Wednesdays," which seemed hokey and cliche at first, but then suddenly became an intriguing idea...we'll see! In any case, with just over 4 months to the wedding, all those little details that seemed trivial when we first started (shoes, jewelry, programs, stamps, etc.) are now starting to come up on the to-do list. It's not a bad thing per se. It means we've gotten most of the big things off the to-do list (cake, wedding rings, and invitations have been the most recent cross offs in the last two weeks!). Still, they're also kind of putzy. Like addressing my envelopes by hand. This is a good idea...I just know it is... (But ask me what I think about it after this weekend!). 

3. Testing my patience - As part of my transition to teaching in Minnesota, I needed to take and pass the MTLE...two sets of educator competency tests, one on my content area, the other on general pedagogy for secondary education. I took a set of these tests in WI to be licensed, but Minnesota doesn't accept those scores, so I had to start from scratch. Consequently, that also meant studying from scratch, as most of that educational theory/developmental psychology stuff that I learned in college wasn't exactly fresh in my mind. So I spent the better part of a month, and 400 notecards, reviewing and reteaching myself what would be on the test, all so that I could regurgitate it for the state...and then go back to my classroom (where I'm currently licensed to teach anyway...without having passed the test!). Makes a ton of sense...right!?

4. Writing on other things - As previously mentioned, I also dove back into my second draft of the novel I began two summers ago. Having solicited feedback on draft one, I was uncertain with how to proceed on draft two without changing major pieces of the story. J Word and I had talked and toyed with ideas last winter when we first started dating and I had shared a portion with him, but it's harder than you might think to just abandon your first story track while keeping your characters intact and developing the same theme. So it took a while to figure out where everything was going...and it's still a work in progress. But 80 pages in, at least there's a new, albeit very general, direction! 

5. J Word - Then of course there's J Word. In all honesty, a lot of my blogging used to be done at 8:00pm when I was home from school/rehearsal/the gym/etc, sitting on my couch with mindless TV on in the background, and left to my own devices. Now, my 8:00pm's are far less lonely, and if given the choice to blog alone or curl up on the couch and watch a movie, or play a very competitive game of Chinese Checkers, or kick butt in a game of darts...well you can see how/why my preferences have changed a bit. If not having time to blog is a "problem," then J Word is the best kind of problem to have! :) 

There it is, my entire list of excuses. I don't really apologize for any of them because it's been a pretty decent stretch of weeks, but I do wish I hadn't let things go by the wayside for quite as long as I did. I make no promises for a Valentine's weekend post...nor should you be sticking around waiting for one. Do something with your sweetheart...and if you don't have one, use it as an excuse to do something really nice for yourself! In any case, enjoy. And as always...

Happy Trails,